Forgiveness, as a character strength, can sometimes be difficult to harness, mostly because when we need to call on it, we’re feeling hurt.

It’s true too that we all make mistakes and that we all see the world differently, through our own eyes and personal value systems. These are influenced by family, education, culture, faith and world views. While all of our emotions serve a purpose, sometimes holding onto anger, pain and other emotions associated with conflict or difference of opinion can be unhealthy and can lead to bitterness and can impact on our physical or mental health. There are times when we can benefit from moving on or forgiving in a particular situation to also protect our own wellbeing.

We can also try to forgive ourselves for our own mistakes; sometimes the voice in our heads can be our harshest critic. It’s true that we all make them: little errors made at work, missing a deadline, or saying something without fully thinking through the consequences. Sometimes it’s also true that we’re kinder and more considerate to others than we are to ourselves, and we can all benefit from a little self- compassion.

In the Gospel of Matthew 18:21-22, Peter asks Jesus how often he should forgive: ‘Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?’ Jesus responds, ‘Not seven times, but I tell you, seventy-seven times’.

This shows that opportunities for forgiveness never really end. During his Angelus address from a window overlooking St Peter’s Square in September 2020, Pope Francis said that when Jesus said we must forgive “seventy-seven times” he meant, in biblical language, to forgive always. He went on to question just how much suffering and war could be avoided if forgiveness underpinned our lifestyle. The sacrament of Reconciliation is also an important option to help us on our journey as people.

This week as a community, we focus on the remembrance of National Sorry Day. National Sorry Day also acknowledges the great strength of Stolen Generations Survivors and reflects on how, as Australians, we can all play a part in the healing and reconciliation process for our people and our nation. The willingness to forgive in the cases of such traumatic hurt demonstrates incredible strength and hopefully constructs a pathway to greater understanding, compassion, healing and hope for all of us.

In Pastoral Care at SMC, students have been working with tools and strategies associated with forgiveness. Year 7 and 9 girls attended an Enlighten Education session, which forged pathways in conflict resolution and stronger relationships and Year 7 and 9 Boys also attended workshops, which focused on being a ‘good human’, being respectful and inclusive and being the best we can be. Forgiveness is key to all of these processes.

It’s true that using the strength of Forgiveness doesn’t delete mistakes, but it does help us to try to focus on the positive which can a lot more constructive, for ourselves, those closest to us and for the wider world. It can potentially lead to the forging of positive change, and also helps us feel more peaceful, sleep better and encourages better relationships.

Wishing you a peaceful week ahead.

Tonia Carfora, Year 7-9 Wellbeing Initiatives Leader